Sunday, March 21, 2010

all god's children

Kid, 9 years old, finds out her father has Huntington's disease. She doesn't know what it is, or that it can't be cured, but she knows God's almighty. So she says a little prayer. "Dear God, if you make my dad better, I promise I'll eat all my vegetables. Love, H." Isn't that something? It's like she's asking him for this incredible thing, and all she's offering in return is she'll eat her vegetables, something she should be doing anyways. I mean, yes, it's hard for her to eat them, she doesn't like them, but it's universally accepted that Huntington's is incurable, so she's basically asking Him for a miracle. And you know what's amazing, she goes to her dad and tells him it's all gonna be OK, she's prayed and God's gonna answer her prayers. Faith doesn't come in a purer form than that.

Maybe we should all have stayed little. It makes it so easy to handle the unknown, when you think you know how it's going to turn out. I'm doing another application. I saw an opening at a place I've come to like, and I went for it. A week ago, so now I have those butterflies all over again. I'm praying for a positive response, and believing like that child believed is, er, kinda hard. See, a funny thing happened on the way to the moon - I grew up. I found out that I can't fly. That my dad can't, in fact, make the rain fall. That if I jump into the river I will drown. That the tooth fairy is, like all fairies, a myth. I read the Little House books when I was a child (I'm reading them again, btw, trynna get back some of that glow) and it seemed so idyllic. Laura grew up in the marshes, around all these people that got her everything she wanted, and no one ever fought with anyone else, and the nature around her was like out of a movie. 

It's like that Faith Hill song:
Before I grew up I saw you on a cloud
I could bless myself in your name and 
pat you on your wings
Before I grew up I heard you whisper so loud
"Life is hard, and so is love, child, 
believe in all these things"
I found mayonnaise bottles and poked holes on top
To capture Tinker Bell
And they were just fireflies to the untrained eye 
But I could always tell

I believe in fairytales and 
dreamers dreams like bed sheet sails
And I believe in Peter Pan and 
miracles anything I can to get by
And fireflies

Well I've grown up so I don't still believe in fireflies, but I am still God's child, aren't I? I can still ask stuff of him, can't I? So I'm asking for this. I'm older now, so I know sometimes prayers can be answered with no. But it's not like I'm coming from the doldrums so even if it comes to that it's still gonna be OK. He's brought me this far. Maybe He's got different plans for me, I dono. But dear Lord, if it's all the same with You, this is how I want it to go.

END

5 comments:

Biche said...

I wish you luck. I hope you get the job...or better.

God can do amazing things! Just leave it to him/her. :-)

Cold Turkey said...

This is very well written and heavy on the heart. Faith does indeed move mountains and you'll once day look behind, at the present.

csmith23 said...

thx Biche, for the wishes. I saw you say "...bygones..." and I remembered Richard Fish, now I have to get my old Ally McBeal dvd's so I can watch it again. He was hilarious!

And you cold turkey (interesting name) too.

Misstarii said...

Looking at life through the eyes of a child...One word FAITH!
Hope you get the job..

csmith23 said...

hey, thanks. hope so too. or at least that i get called in for an interview - I've been to shockingly few of those! ;)